Sunday, November 18, 2007

Week 39 - If he fit in my pocket, I would have stolen him.



This post is so exciting I don't even want to waste time writing some crappy back story. Just read…


Friday, 9/28/07: Bloomsburg Fair: Rufus.

I've been at the Bloom fair tons of times. That's not what this is all about. This post is about this guy, Rufus, the true love of my life.

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Handsome isn't he. Rufus is a capybara, the largest rodent on earth. Oh. My heart swells.

I've been keeping my eye on this guys since he was a wee lad 3 years ago (Rufus is about halfway to his goal weight 130 lbs.). So it's not the first time I've ever seen a capy - this is the first time that I have ever petted a capy.

There hair feels like hay. His disposition is that of a big, fat golden lab. He likes his belly rubbed and to be fed pellets made of hay.

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I want one badly. Of course, so does my dad and sister. It probably has everything to do with the fact that they look like big guinea pigs. My dad would probably name his Mumbly Pig or something like that.

Here he is eating out of my hand.

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And me giving him scratchies.

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I have video, but I'll be a son of a gun if I can get iMovie to do anything for me. I'll repost, so keep your eyes open.

If I do ever win the lottery, or become very successful and whatever, I will have one. Mark these words. I don't need world domination. I just need a fatty pig.


Also, I always talk about having a chicken. This is what they would look like.

This guys is a Polish rooster.

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I forget this guys name, but he is so kick ass even Troy liked him.

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Week 38 - It's little and read and goes vroom…



This week was officially the last week of summer. It also was the beginning of me wondering where in the hell has all the time gone. Even now, writing this post completely behind schedule, I am just wondering where the hell did my summer go.

It's so true Days of Our LIves - it is like sand through an hourglass.

And because I have no idea where my time has gone, I have no excuse for where all the new has gone. Although it doesn't feel like it, I really am trying new things all of the time. They just aren't really blog worthy. I'm going to be scraping around the bottom of the barrel for this post. Not really the bottom, just about 3/4 down. And here it goes…


Friday, 9/21/07: Home Delivery: boneless wings.

I am a true fan of the bonless wing. Yeah, it's actually not a wing but it's delicious and usually gross-out free. I don't like to rip meat from a bone, mostly because I have had anatomy classes and I know exactly how that muscle worked on the poor, dead chicken. And then I get really bummed out thinking about Luke. Or Tripod when he had his leg amputated and we left it in the fridge for weeks to look at when curiosity struck us.

But mostly it's just gross. And I always end up getting some chewy cartiledge or a vein or some more heinous that that.

So I stick with the boneless wings. They are tasty and just as deep fried as the actual wings. Sometimes they are grilled. Either way, I've never found a vein in them and that makes them even more delicious.

We tried the boneless wings here with their new Balsamic Blueberry. Or something like that. They were yummy. I love Balsamic vinegar and Blueberry's so it was perfect.

Here are some pictures of the yumminess.

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HIGHLY recommended. So so good.



Later that night we went back to the garage and I finally learned how to weld. I had a little trouble at first, but I think that I did ok for my first time. It took a while to catch on - more time than I would like anyhow - which means that it took me my 8th try instead of the 1st. I should be an expert at everything and I get so pissed off when I'm not.

Yes, I am wearing flip-flops to weld. And yes, that shit that sprays in the air when your welding does kind of hurt when it hits you.

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Here is my first bead!!!

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This is what it looks like up close. It really is so bright that it makes all normal light black. This was with the lights on, but it did make me think a second, "Did that jerk Troy make me weld with the lights out?" No, I'm just an idiot and I forgot.

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I do kind turn into a cry baby when light is involved with my precious, precious eyeballs and all of the light coming into the helmet was fucking up my chi. Troy drapped his hankie around my head - so I think that I may be the first chick to ever weld with a Babuska on.

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But I rocked the shit out of that bubuska.



Saturday, 9/22/07: The Garage: Beautiful Beautiful Things

Today I finished up 2 projects: the heater for the truck and Troy's tricycle. I've been working on this heater for quite some time. It's the only heat that the truck will have - that's just how things worked in 1948.

I'm positive that I have a picture of this "before" somewhere, but my file management is *cough* lacking right now. Here is the finished project. Weep in it's glory.

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This is pretty much what the truck will look like in the end - flat black with candy red. Fetching I'd say.

And I know that it looks pretty perfect and I seem like I can't do anything wrong - BUT - I had to sand it 2x because of fuck-ups on my part. I swear to god that if it didn't come out right this time, I was going to light the whole garage on fire. But cooler heads prevailed and now I can pass it off like I'm an expert. I'm not. That was my dose of modesty for the day.



I think that I mentioned before that Troy wanted a tricycle. He found one in his uncle's front yard. It was old and rusty and one of the wheels was busted off. Here are some before and after shots.

It says $6 - but Troy got it for free.

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A big ole pile of shit. I had to sand this back to hell before it was ready for prep.

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I had to tape off the seat 2x to get it perfect. I started with 2 coats of primer and 4 coats of white. Then tape and paper and 3 coats of red atleast.

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In person, the handle bars are not as nice. I spent 2 hours sanding them down and they still look like hell.

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I did not give a shit about the tire.

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This is my paint booth. And by paint booth I mean "Open garage door."

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The beautiful peices before assembly.

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This finished project. I know. It's really nice and I couldn't be prouder.

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And it only matters if this kid likes it.

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Here is my parting shot. It is not uncommon for me to come home looking like this or worse.

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Week 37 - It’s alive.



This whole post is about the truck… so if you don't give a shit about that kind of thing, keep on keeping on. Is you are interested, especially in something really kick ass, like an engine turning over the first time, then this is for you. Our little baby Gypsy finally fucking turned over. Hallelujah!

I actually wrote this post back in September right after this happened. I just suck because I've been too crazy busy to actually post it. But here it goes…



Sunday, 9/9/07: The Garage: It is ALIVE!

So, I am have been at the garage ALOT this summer, mostly because I am a truck widow. My boyfriend is living every boy's dream by building his own truck and I sit idly by. Well, not really idly. I mostly just make fun of everybody and try to help wherever possible.

I do more work than this guy. This is Ryan, Troy's brother. Beats me what he was doing here, but I think that it had something to do with a nap.

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I also hung up this air freshener. It's cute but smells like high school cruising and bad dates. It's also incredibly hard to photo graph because my camera could notget it through it's thick skull that yes, you can focus on something translucent.

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I think that I look fat in this shirt, but I'm not sure yet. But this is me definately hanging it.

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Most importantly, here are two videos of the truck running. Well, starting to run. In it's infancy. Also, a picture of Troy looking confused. But he really wasn't. I just caught him at a bad time.

Here is a video of it. WARNING - I talk loud in it. Especially at the beginning. Jesus, I don't know how you people deal with hearing my voice all the time. ew.




Later on in the week, I started to take apart this really old stereo that we are going to repurpose for the truck. Here are bits and pieces. Of course, I could have taken a picture of the full thing before I took it apart, but that would be practical. And I am anything but practical.

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I don't know what leaked all over it, but I haven't died yet so I think that it can't be anything too bad. If you read my bulletin about this a couple weeks ago, this is what we need an amp for. Thanks to a very generous Delo donation, we have a speaker.

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This is all the shit we didn't use. What a mess. It's going to a good place though - total recycling of all this very old junk. BTW, it doesn't really smell bad, although you would think so by looking at it.

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I can't express how exciting it was to hear this thing purr. Troy rebuilt the carb and not without a lot of trouble and fuss. You can always check out his (rarely updated) blog here. Maybe if you yell at him, he will actually post more.

I'm out. It smells like fumes in here.

Here is Troy and Kyle hooking up spark plug cables. I think this shot is funny - but I'm not sure why. I just know I take REALLY FUCKING NICE photos.

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Week 36: Mummers make me cry.

Tuesday, September 18, 2007


Holy crap. It's September. I think that it might be the worst month of the year, if only because it is either intolerably warm with Indian summer or intolerably cold with early frosts. I just want to be warm. Luke warm would be perfectly fine.

These weeks were warm but you could definitely feel the chill. My skirts will have to be put away soon which saddens me. Our tomato plant is FINALLY starting to pop out some yummies for the guinea pigs and Troy. The leaves will be changing momentarily and then I will have to huff and puff and rake. Oh fall.


Saturday, 9/1/07: Hazleton: Superbad

Troy and I went to see Superbad with Tre and Nick. It was really crazy funny. I think that you should see it, if only to see the coolest cops in the history of teen films. The whole theatre was laughing out loud!

I think it is closer to how I talked with my buddies in high school and college than American Pie. AND the more I like this movie, the more I hate Jason Biggs.


Sunday, 9/2/07: Ashland, Pa: ABA Parade

Definition of the ABA Parade:

The Ashland Boys Association, established circa 1901, remains active in the borough, and continues to host its annual Labor Day parade based on the association's age-old tradition of inviting its boys back to their stomping grounds to celebrate fond memories of growing up in the Anthracite Region.

That is for all my homies that have never stepped a toe into the coal region. It is also called the Ashland Mummers Day Parade.

Some of you know how I feel about the Mummers. I lurve them. They are rock stars to me. I actually cried in their presence. I. Cried. Here is a picture of me with the a the band leader of a Polish Mummer club.


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Anywho. This is the first time I have been to the parade in about 10 years and I spent it with a very good friend, and the best locker partner in the world, Kat. I also got to see Cheryl, who I haven't seen in about 10 years. I really have to thank Kat for letting me chill with her. Most of these pictures are in my photo album, but I'll share some here as well.


Here is Cheryl and Kat. I'm doing that blur thing on my camera again. I'm sure that when I'm 40, I'm going to be really pissed off that all my pictures are blurry - but fuck it.

For some reason (?), Kat has horns and Cheryl has a halo. I guess that's saying something…

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Me and the very pretty Kat.

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Troy bought me a glow wand and a glow necklace. He really is quite the amiable boyfriend. But then again, I don't bug him for diamonds and Gucci… I bug him for glow wands. I'm not sure who is winning. So the rest of the night, I took photos with them.

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Here is the glow wand in action.

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Here is one of the pictures that I took with the mummers. I have another couple. He was very nice and quite the looker in all those red feathers.

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One of the biggest surprises was seeing Sarah and her daughter Jade again, and meeting her husband Frank and there new baby boy. Good looking kids, btw. Sarah was one of my first really close friends that I made in high school and we were BFFs through out. We lost touch over the years, but I still love her tons.

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These photos are after I got home and talked to Tre. The rainbow sword took away all of my acne in these photos, so it it quit magic.

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Monday, 9/3/07: Elysburg, PA: Knoebels

Ah, Knoebles. This is one of my best memories from childhood and I love going there every year. I think that if we ever did move to the other side of the world, or the US, Knoebles would be on my top 10 list of things I miss about PA.


This year, we convinced my Pop-pop Teddy to go after about a 10 year absence. He had a good time, although we had to twist his arm a little to do so.

This was taken on the train ride when we were going through a tunnel. Pop-pop was ducking so he didn't hit his head and making some "Whhhhhooooooooohhhhhhhhhh" noise. This is part of where I get my silly from.

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Tyler and Pop-pop were checking out the fish in the stream. I wish this picture had a better angle, but I think it's amazingly cute.

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Here is Rick and Troy getting into cars in the bumper cars. This was probably the best time that I have ever had in bumper cars. EVER!

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I don't think that I've hung out with Rick in about 4 years, but probably closer to 5, which is a shame because we were really close some time ago. So it was really great to see him again. We got to talk quite a bit while Tyler took Troy on all of these rides that spin.

Rick and I went on this ride together. It's called the Looper, although it should be called the Puker. You make the ring spin around while going around in a circle by pulling a lever. Rick was in charge of this and we kicked everybody's ass by going the fastest with the most revolutions.

But it made me realize that I am not young and that I now get dizzy fast and strong. I was useless for the rest of the day. But it was a good time while it lasted.

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After this, we went to the arcade and spent to much money and rode the gasoline boats. I drove Rick around in a crappy boat that had NO power. We held up the line while 3 boats passed us. So it goes. It was still a great day and I slept awesome that night.



So, that is that. Another week down and out. By the time you read this I will have passed 2000 total views of my blog. Not bad considering I didn't really post over the summer. Thanks for reading, I hope I made you giggle.

Week 35: Johnny’s gone.


Saturday, 7/25/07: Grange Fair: Johnny Cash Tribute Band.

I hated Johnny Cash when I was 15. It was right about the time when "Dehlia's gone" came out and I couldn't understand why everyone thought this misogynistic jerk was great and why it was such a big deal that he released this horrible song about a dead girl. I was more interested in Primus.

Cut to 5 years later and I realized what a tool I was when I was younger - as if I needed another example of how short-sighted you can be at that age. I love Cash more than I did when I was 20 and I think that my admiration for the man will only grow as time goes on.

Because he is gone and the closest that I will ever come to seeing him preform is through old concert footage, I was really excited to see this tribute show at the fair. By the time that we left the performance, I was kind of sad and disappointed.

Now, don't get me wrong, the guy did a fine job although the whole show seemed like a talking wax museum, mostly because the guy spoke as though he was Johnny giving a "Unplugged" monologue between each song about what was going on in "his" life when he wrote it. The whole thing was kind of like going on a tour of the chocolate factory at Hershey. We stayed through most of it until a "Boy named Sue." When Johnny says "My name is Sue. How do you do?!" You are supposed to feel it in your balls, for lack of a better term. It is supposed to shake you. This guy didn't shake me… but I did yawn a little.

We left right after. I was also a little pissed about a tempo change in Ring of Fire.

That's a long story to just show you a picture of us sitting in the stand. Like every year I am at the fair, I couldn't leave without a peach dumpling and petting a cow.

This is Ryan, Kyle and Troy in the grandstand.

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This is a picture of the stage. You can kind of make out Johnny II. I thought he kind of looked like Wayne Newton.

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I mentioned before that I came close to getting a chicken this summer. This is what he would have looked like.

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This is my crotch:

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The best part of the fair in my opinion, besides all the yummy food, is the art show - particularly the kids. This is the best drawing from this year. Last year it was a dinosaur. Kyle Troy and I were going to take up a collection to buy it and I'm sad that we didn't. I don't even have a picture of it. It was THE BEST THING I've ever seen. This is also kick-ass and will have to do.

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Here is a picture of the fair from where we parked. I could give you a history lesson on the Grange Fair, but this post is already long and boring. Just enjoy the pretty.

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That's it. One of my best memories of this fair is Troy talking to the chickens in chicken-talk. He's lucky they were behind wire because I'm positive this one white rooster would have his face for lunch. No wonder Ralph hated you Troy!!! Kidding. You can't stop my chicken love.